Can I get my coffee with a side of Lick?
What Your Coffee Order Says About How You Are in Bed
Your coffee choice doesn’t just define your morning routine—it reveals exactly how you move in the sheets. Let’s break it down.
Cold Brew (Black) – aka BBC (Big Black Coffee)
No fluff, no hesitation—just straight to it. You’re efficient, intense, and dangerously good at what you do. If you drink cold brew year-round, even in the dead of winter, you’ve got stamina. You’re not here to waste time—you came with a mission.
And if your partner taps out? It’s time to Tap In like a Saweetie song.
But when you’re done? Get off me. It’s hot in here.
Cold Brew with a Splash of Milk – The Doggy Style Special
You like a little softness in your dominance. You put in work, but you’re also about balance—rough when needed, smooth when desired. You can take charge, but you also know how to slow it down just right.
You’re the type to switch it up mid-session just to keep them toes curling.
Espresso Shot – The “You Like It on Top” Ride or Die
A power bottom walks into a bar…
You’re refined, precise, and straight to the point. You might not be in it for an all-night marathon, but what you do in five minutes? Legendary.
Strong, intense, and unforgettable—like a quick rendezvous in a luxury hotel before heading off to close a deal. You’ve got that high-class mystery lover energy.
Hot Black Coffee (Drip) – The "Come Here Baby, Lay on Your Side" Type Beat
You’re low-maintenance but powerful. No unnecessary theatrics—just grit, endurance, and control. You’re built for longevity, not just a flashy performance.
You work with your hands, know how to handle business, and have a way of making even the simple things feel primal.
You like good, romantic sex.
Look me in the eye, breathe in my mouth.
Oat Milk Latte – Ms. Missionary
You love comfort and softness. You’re here for slow, sensual sessions—the type to light candles, put on a playlist, and make sure everything feels just right.
Foreplay matters.
I’ll say it again: Foreplay matters!
If foreplay isn’t the biggest thing in the room, I’m not interested. We’re just going to sit here naked and stare into each other’s eyes for five minutes before anything happens.
